Monday

Stagecraft, Crofters Arts Centre, Gilgamore, Monroe, Scotland

Performance artist and musician Gregory Bracken Wells returns to the theme of his earlier, less formal work, retracing his steps along the line between agony and ecstasy. Using an impressive one thousand light 'shadow-maker', more than two hundred plasma screens and one hundred fumefume dancers, Bracken Wells aims to top his 2004 masterwork Cladden, when he set fire to his kilt. Expect bongos.

Tuesday 

A Good Read, Radio 4, 11pm

Jordon joins regular host Martha Kearney and guest David Baddiel in recommending her favourite read. She is made to look a fool throughout (in that coded way middle-class people understand), her opinions are given undue weight, and every subtlety in her thoughts, as vocalised, fall on ears thick to the nuances of her language. 

Wednesday 

Dan's Gaff and Coffee, Hoxton Triangle, near Spangle-Faced Joe

Experimental short (5'2"!) filmmaker Guntha Van Wick hosts an evening of, inevitably, experimental short films. There are no production values, most of the shots are framed hatefully, and all share themes and plots, despite there being no overall theme to the show other than, presumably, utter fucking tedium. Still, it's quite acceptable to linger in the bar.

Friday

Leeds somewhere

More performance art, this time from Absolute, the Icelandic cowboy co-operative theatre group. Exploring the line (as you do) between two concepts any right-minded person would see as related, this time love and hate, the whip-cracking skaters simultaneously define the gigantic gulf twixt awesome and dreadful. 

Sunday

skunks@CamdenPigHouse, Enfield